Being A Master
Article by Hope Alexander
May 28 2007. Article viewed 7155 times.
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Many of you probably want to be masters of something. The word implies power, control, and glory, all of which are things that any healthy young person should aspire to. There are precious few chances for mastery in the modern world, unless you count being over 50 and participting in old peopleīs sports events, but lets face it, thatīs not Mastery of anything, thatīs just being old.
For those who want to weild the power of true mastery, the team here have worked tirelessly to compile a compendium of things you can master.
Web Master Being a web master is a dangerous job indeed. You must manage content, monitor traffic, try to herd the fickle surfers of the Internet into your little site net and make them swim around and around and return compulsively for another taste of what you offer. Being a web master means being prepared to make the tough calls, click the hard links, and moderate the hard comments.
You will be well rewarded for your mastery however. Everyone respects the web master, you might even get some good free cyber sexxoring.
Dungeon Master Many consider being a Dungeon Master to be merely training position that allows you to go onto greater mastery of other things. Not so, Dungeon Masters are perhaps the most accomplished masters of the modern world. Dungeon Masters are story weavers who skillfully keep all players engaged in their campaign. They must settle disputes, order the rolling of the dice, and spring surprises upon the unwary. If you donīt understand anything in this paragraph, you are unlikely to ever become a good DM anyway.
Grand Master Becoming a Grand Master involves being very very good indeed at Martial Arts. Martial arts is very very hard to get good at, owing to the fact that it is physically strenuos, mentally challenging, and will result in multiple ass kickings. Being a Grand Master will however get you some real hardcore respect, at least from people who know who the hell you are. The only downside of this position is that you tend to be really old by the time you get there and will be remembered by future generations only by your faded photographs, in which you will look strangely like a human incarnation of Yoda.
Master 5 This is a term used in womenīs magazines to refer to young male children, and shoud not be aspired to. It is cheesy, lame, and casts a pall over other forms of Mastery.
BDSM Master A BDSM Master is a person with a penchant for leather and excersizing control over those who serve him. BDSM Masters have no formal qualifications, and can be as impressive as Dog the Bounty Hunter chasing down a crack pipe weilding Hawaiian, or as lame as a teenager who just realised that girls get wet for whips and chains. (Bonus points for those of you who donīt think that either of those scenarios are particularly impressive.) A BDSM Master gets to lurk in a dungeon, play with all sorts of interesting implements, and generally transgress the bounds of normal human interaction with the flick of a whip. Some people say this is weird, strange, even degrading, but BDSM Masters like it that way.
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