Plastic Surgery Selector
Article by Hope Alexander
August 18 2007. Article viewed 35004 times.
Rating: 3 |
Add to favorites | Comment on article
Just 50 years ago, people got old and became ugly. It was a dark time indeed, where women had small breasts, noses were sometimes crooked, asses hung low, and tummies rolled out of control. Thanks to advances in technology, and the blessing of the Lord, there are now options available to the less than entirely attractive masses.
If you feel bad about your appearance, and chances are that you are, clearly the answer is to have someone surgically alter it. After all, God wouldnīt have made silicone if he didnīt want your breasts to be perky and firm now, would he?
When you think of it that way, you could easily say that plastic surgery is something ordained by God himself. Everyone could stand to have a little work done, so to aid you in your choice, here are a few of the top plastic surgery options. Remember, you donīt have to stop with just one proceedure, you can have them all done, sometimes at the same time. It is totally worth putting your body through similar trauma to a bad car accident in order to look hot.
Boob Job
A boob job will not only make you feel better about yourself, it will increase both your career and partnership prospects, and create a greater sense of happiness in those around you. In time, all women will have boob jobs, which means that not having one will make you the odd one out, weird, and probably completely unsucessful. Some people say that boob jobs make your breasts look fake, and can be dangerous, but lets face it, when you have a room full of men staring at your cleavage is if it were
El Dorado, youīre really not going to care.
Nose Job
Your nose is ugly. Noses are ugly in general. Weīre pretty much just all waiting for someone to come up with something better alltogether. I am predicting that sometime in the next 50 years, hot women who have had their noses removed completely will become all the rage, and 50 years after that, babies will have their noses removed at birth, at the same time they have their tracking chip insterted, and their foreskin removed. Itīs just good sense.
Liposuction
Liposuction is an excellent way to avoid responsibility for your own eating habits. Have that cheeseburger, donīt worry about the fat, youīll have it sucked out next week and injected into your lips for a much fuller look. Liposuction is a publicly responsible surgery to have done, as it allows impressionable young people to see how a real person should look, no matter how crappy their lifestyle is.
Ass Implant
Letīs face it, your ass probably isnīt all that it could be. It should be pert and cheerful, waggling invitingly at all who should happen to walk behind you. People whoīve had this surgery get a īlift and seperateī effect all the time, which creates a very interesting sight when walking down the street, as well as in the bedroom. If you want your ass to double as a coaster for hot drinks, a ledge for passersby to lean against when they get tired, and to get extra bounce when you do that little move on a trampoline where you jump from your feet to your ass and back up again, then this is the surgery for you. Be careful though, several Russian women who had this proceedure and then went and played on a trampoline are now orbiting the stratosphere, locked in eternal freefall.
Vaginoplasty
Made famous by Jenna Jameson, a Vaginoplasty is the gift that keeps on giving. Both you and your partner will enjoy the added snugness and better fit that a vaginoplasty allows, tightening the walls of your most intimate chamber to the point where you may be able to imprison a man there for hours.
 |
Rate this article
1 |
2 |
3 |
4 |
5 |
6
|
 |
|
